Gamer Boi

To the tune of 'Sk8er Boi' by Avril Lavigne. All due apologies to the pubescent moppet.

He was a boy
She was a girl
He couldn’t have been any more obvious
He played Runequest
And stared at her breasts
What more can I say?
He wanted her
She'd never tell
Secretly she couldn’t stand his smell
All of his friends
Stared at her too
Beyond that they didn’t know what to do

He was a gamer boy
She said you’re a lamer boy
He wasn't good enough for her
She had a pretty face
He had a massive waist
He needed to work upon his girth

Ten years from now
He sits at home
Playing a twentieth level Gnome
He’s really fat
And grown a beard
Even his best friends they say he’s weird
He walks down the street
Guess who he sees
She’s a professor at MIT
He asks her out
She isn’t moved
His personal hygiene has not improved

Lucky girl but you missed out
On a gamer who is really stout
And he worries his closest friends
This is how the story ends
Just as well that you could see,
See the man that boy would be
He’d make a fortune in IT
And then spend it on D&D

She turned down the gamer boy
And who could blame her, boy
He wasn't good enough for her
Now he plays EverQuest
In underpants and a vest
Does your pretty face see what he's worth?