In like a lion, out like a lamb...

But that's enough about my love life.

Me: I've had a great idea!
Her: Uh-oh.
Me: What do you mean, 'uh-oh'. You haven't even heard it yet!
Her: Experience has taught me to say 'uh-oh' when you have a good idea, but go on.
Me: Well, apparently, right, due to the refraction of light, when you're underwater in goggles or a mask, everything appears up to 25% bigger and so I was thinking...
Her: No.
Me: But...
Her: No.
Me: I haven't got to the good bit yet?
Her: No!
Me: You see, what I was going to suggest was...
Her: Look. You got as far as '25% bigger' and lost me right there. I'm not interested in hearing the rest as I know it will be something perverse.
Me: You have a really low opinion of me, don't you?