Nov. 4th, 2011

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After a strike ballot held yesterday, Britain’s biggest public sector union, Unison, has declared an extensive publicity campaign for the strike “because otherwise you might not realise.” The industrial action, planned for the 30th of November, will be backed by an extensive advertising campaign to ensure that the rest of us are aware it is taking place.

Unison spokesman Will Poole said “Normally if you ring your council during office hours nobody picks up because we’re all too busy on diversity awareness training courses, outside having a fag or signed off for stress. But on November the 30th you won’t get an answer because we’ll all be on strike.”

“In your face, Thatcher”, he added.

Mr Poole then went on to call for blanket media coverage of the event highlighting that, rather than working, Unison members would be spending their day at home watching Loose Women in their underpants, apparently blissfully unaware that they get that sort of coverage in the Sun and Daily Mail all the time anyway.

The union will face an uphill struggle to make its mark as recent surveys have shown that most normal people have to be forced to engage with the public sector at gunpoint.

However, the union was criticised for calling a strike after only 29% of members voted in the ballot, whilst many members of the union were surprised that a strike ballot had been called at all. Mandy Wilcox, a social worker from Retford, said: “I didn’t vote in the ballot because I only found out the other day we weren’t still on strike from the last time. I’ve not been into the office for over a year and nobody's said anything. With successful strike action like that, it's only a matter of time before the Coalition toffs all resign.”

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