Truth in advertising.

There's an overpass from Stevenage station to the town centre through which I trudge miserably on a daily basis on my way to work. It runs directly past the local arts centre and so is usually papered with posters for upcoming shows and events there and, in an effort to enagage more with passing trade, they've recently installed a motion-sensitive speaker system in the tunnel to make announcements as people walk by.
Given the crime rate in Stevenage town centre it can be quite disconcerting to have a disembodied voice bellow "Hey, you!" as you plod your weary way to the train after working late in the office, but I'm sure it serves a valuable purpose in making the merry shopping burghers of Stevenage aware that Shakin' Stevens is doing his 30-year anniversary show at the Centre for cultural awareness and reeducation*.

Anyway; dragging my weary feet once more through the overpass this morning I was assailed by the cheery voice of an out of work jobbing actor telling me that this year's panto was Beauty and the Beast and would be starring a selection of people off the telly who I'd never heard of plus "A few surprises".

I paused for a moment and waited for the message to repeat and, sure enough, the stress on the message was there: "A few surpises".

You'd've thought, I mused to myself, that the theatre would have been keener to promote that their show has any surprises at all rather than to stress that there aren't many of them, but what do I know? I'm not a theatre impressario. Maybe the people of Stevenage don't like surprises and can turn nasty when their expectations are subverted beyond a certain point**.

So there you are - if you're looking for festive family entertainment which won't contain anything unexpected, try Stevenage theatre. It's their primary sales message.

^{*Or whatever it's actually called.
**Actually, this is almost certainly true.}