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Choose your own adventure
A friend of mine recently spent some time in a rather new-agey sort of Spa retreat in California. As far as I could make out from the description it's the sort of place where you can get your chakras balanced in the morning, take part in pilates-hiking in the afternoon and then in the evening dine on a delicious low-calorie macrobiotic vegan casserole before retiring to your five-star en-suite yurt.
Now, as far as I'm concerned, a holiday isn't a holiday without a beach, a nasty dose of sunburn and cocktails that come in a tall glass with an inch of whipped cream on top and a sparkler sticking out of it so the whole experience didn't sound entirely my cup of tea. However, one thing she did whilst she was there which caught my attention was having her horoscope cast. Horoscope, eh?, I said to myself. If there's one thing I can make an LJ post out of, it's horoscopes.
The thing about astrology is that it's so darn fascinating. Just because it's about as good as predicting the future as reading the entrails of a goat (if a little less messy) doesn't mean that even hardened sceptics don't stop and browse their stars when they read the paper in the morning, and having your birth chart and horoscope cast is the same - it just intrigues you, even thought you know it's just a pile of old tosh.
For example, I just got my birth chart done on a free online service, and apparently I'm a Pisces with Virgo Ascendant.
What does that mean? Anything I like! Going on a journey and meeting a dark stranger? If I want. Good with money? Bad with money? Too sensitive but keeps it all bottled up? All of those things, should I so desire. It's like a Fighting Fantasy 'Choose your own adventure book'. "If you want your star sign to mean that you are caring and sensitive, turn to page 16; if you want your star sign to mean you are go-getting and ambitious, turn to page 20." Thanks to the miracle of astrology meaning nothing, it can mean anything at all! Hurrah! Today I'm going to be troubled by unresolved relationships and have a friend or relative whose name begins with an 'R'. Maybe they passed on recently, maybe they didn't. I'll decide that later.
In reality, what the site told me my horoscope means includes the following: You are tuned in to a higher purpose and your dreams transcend the individual. A deep love for humanity, and compassion that knows no bounds is found with this placement of the Sun. You are not known to be cutthroat business types, nor are you given to throwing themselves out into the world in an aggressive manner. But make no mistake about it, Pisces can be extraordinarily successful when given the chance to express themselves. The arts, marketing, music, teaching, drama, healing arts...these are all fields in which you can find expression.
I'm sure you all recognise me in that description. Apparently I also share birth characteristics with Kurt Cobain. I need that like I need a hole in the head, really I do.
Now, as far as I'm concerned, a holiday isn't a holiday without a beach, a nasty dose of sunburn and cocktails that come in a tall glass with an inch of whipped cream on top and a sparkler sticking out of it so the whole experience didn't sound entirely my cup of tea. However, one thing she did whilst she was there which caught my attention was having her horoscope cast. Horoscope, eh?, I said to myself. If there's one thing I can make an LJ post out of, it's horoscopes.
The thing about astrology is that it's so darn fascinating. Just because it's about as good as predicting the future as reading the entrails of a goat (if a little less messy) doesn't mean that even hardened sceptics don't stop and browse their stars when they read the paper in the morning, and having your birth chart and horoscope cast is the same - it just intrigues you, even thought you know it's just a pile of old tosh.
For example, I just got my birth chart done on a free online service, and apparently I'm a Pisces with Virgo Ascendant.
What does that mean? Anything I like! Going on a journey and meeting a dark stranger? If I want. Good with money? Bad with money? Too sensitive but keeps it all bottled up? All of those things, should I so desire. It's like a Fighting Fantasy 'Choose your own adventure book'. "If you want your star sign to mean that you are caring and sensitive, turn to page 16; if you want your star sign to mean you are go-getting and ambitious, turn to page 20." Thanks to the miracle of astrology meaning nothing, it can mean anything at all! Hurrah! Today I'm going to be troubled by unresolved relationships and have a friend or relative whose name begins with an 'R'. Maybe they passed on recently, maybe they didn't. I'll decide that later.
In reality, what the site told me my horoscope means includes the following: You are tuned in to a higher purpose and your dreams transcend the individual. A deep love for humanity, and compassion that knows no bounds is found with this placement of the Sun. You are not known to be cutthroat business types, nor are you given to throwing themselves out into the world in an aggressive manner. But make no mistake about it, Pisces can be extraordinarily successful when given the chance to express themselves. The arts, marketing, music, teaching, drama, healing arts...these are all fields in which you can find expression.
I'm sure you all recognise me in that description. Apparently I also share birth characteristics with Kurt Cobain. I need that like I need a hole in the head, really I do.
It must be someone who knows you
(Anonymous) 2010-07-28 09:33 am (UTC)(link)Sun Sign Pisces with Virgo Rising
Virgo rising seems to be quite refined. Very often a probing, analytical speaker with a soft tone to your voice, others may see you as intelligent and witty. Others may accuse you of either being too neat, or too messy, but you will certainly have a distinct pattern to your character. Others will notice how important work is to you as well.
This Ascendant runs the risk of criticizing and undermining a lover because he truly wants perfection. In matters of love and dating this could be a bit of an impediment. A relationship with Virgo rising is never easy and must be earned.
When it comes to sex and relationship Virgo rising will analyze a love match to pieces before he surrenders to it. Once you’ve won the heart of someone with a Virgo Ascendant however, he’s surely one of the most attentive signs in bed.
Pisces really need to be needed. They suffer from fear of rejection and low self-esteem. Pisceans are tender and caring, but frequently become the victims of domineering and uncaring partners.
Pisceans are the most loving and giving of the signs, their ability to select an inappropriate partner is legendary. In the right relationship, their sexuality will blossom and become something of an art form, especially as they get a little older, more experienced and more confident.
I'm "Cancer with Scorpio Rising" which is apparently sultry & passionate, so that's one in the eye for predestination
H
Re: It must be someone who knows you
That bit made me laugh out loud. In the office.
Ha ha, pwned
(Anonymous) 2010-07-28 09:46 am (UTC)(link)H
Re: Ha ha, pwned
"Hit it off in the boudoir", eh? Ding-dong.
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Re: I am a Leo, this is what it says about me
Or a Jungle VIP, anyway... :p