Please sir, can I have some booze?

Well, It's that time of year when I give up the demon drink and boy, I feel virtuous. As yet I haven't decided on whether I'll be drinking at robinbloke's party. The probabilities suggest I will, despite my earlier experience of God having an itchy trigger finger. Either I'll let my moral absolutism slip for an evening, or I'll sit there with an air of pursed-lip American Gothic grimness, handing out leaflets from the Temperance movement and trying to lead choruses of 'Onward Christian Soldiers'. We'll see.
However, abstaining from drinking has lead to certain cravings, which are starting to manifest themselves in increasingly obvious ways...

(The scene is one of an early Victorian workhouse – although it may be David's office, it’s difficult to tell the different. A line of orphans is filing through the building. All of them bear significant marks of malnutrition and alcohol deprivation. Some of them are visibly shaking uncontrollably. The music starts.)

Is it worth the waiting for?
If we live 'til eighty four
All we ever get is grape juice!
Ev'ry day we say our prayer --
Will they change the bill of fare?
Still we get the same old grape juice!
There is not a dram, not a tot can we find,
Can we beg, can we borrow, or cadge,
But there's nothing to stop us from getting a thrill
When we all close our eyes and imag...ine

Booze, glorious Booze!
Hot toddies and Brandy!
Gin, Premier Cru’s --
Two gallons of Shandy!
Sobriety is a disease!
And booze is the best cure!
Rich gentlemen have it, boys --
Liver failure!

Booze, glorious booze!
We're anxious to try it.
Three barrels a day --
Our favourite diet!

Just picture a great big mug --
Chilled, foaming and gleaming.
Of, booze,
Wonderful booze,
Marvellous booze,
Glorious booze.

Booze, glorious booze!
What is there more handsome?
Gulped, swallowed or quaffed --
Still worth a king's ransom.
What is it we dream about?
What brings on a sigh?
Piled Staropramen cans,
Six feet high!

Booze, glorious booze!
Drink right through the wine list.
Just loosen your throat
Two gallons and get pissed
Work up a new thirst.
In this interlude --
The booze,
Once again, booze
Fabulous booze,
Glorious booze.

(The boys walk past a window, through which may be seen the town beadle, Mr. Montgomery, who is drinking like there is no tomorrow. And the way he’s going, for him there probably won’t be.)

Booze, glorious booze!
Don't care what it tastes like --
Plonk!
Watered-down!
Cheap!
Don't care what the pub’s like.
Just thinking of growing drunk --
Our senses go reeling
One moment of knowing that
Tanked-up feeling!

Booze, glorious booze!
Come on, just give it
That extra bit more --
One drop of Glenlivet
Why should we be fated to
Do nothing but brood
On booze,
Magical booze,
Wonderful booze,
Marvellous booze,
Fabulous booze,
Glorious booze!

Yes, I know I've posted this before, but it remains as true now as it did then.