Some rules to live by.

1. Anything which looks too good to be true almost certainly is.
But people still send money to Nigerian scammers. Sigh.

2. Despite appearances, Wasabi is not a dip like Guacamole and should not be treated as such.
Aren't you glad you have me to tell you these things?

3. Always be personally responsible for your own income.
If you rely exclusively upon mummy & daddy/partner/the social or similar source of income which you have no influence over, sooner or later you're going to get burned. Take control of your own finances.

4. Any person who thinks that you will be interested in hearing about how mummy and/or daddy didn't love them enough the first time you meet them has an above-average chance of being nuts. Do not get involved.
If a friend tells you personal things then that's what friends are for. If a stranger tells you personal things then they're probably attention seeking, and not in an good way.

5. If there is a pattern in your life which you don't like then the mostly likely cause of it is you. Change yourself before you try to change others.
Aristotle once said that we are what we repeatedly do. Smart feller, Aristotle.

6. Anyone who tells you they have magic/psychic/divine/other powers is either lying or deluded.
They are, you know. And if you think you do, then you're deluded too.

7. If you split up with your other half, quit your job and stop paying your rent, don't expect any sympathy when you complain of being single, skint and homeless.
I'm often amazed by how often people do stuff like this.

8. Treating people like they're stupid is the best way of getting them to act as if they are.

9. Whatever you want to do, don't procrastinate.
What do you want to do? Whatever it is, go and do it right now. Why are you reading your friends list? Stop it.