Parables updated

The parables of the New Testament are intended as metaphors to teach us how to live our lives; basically they're stories about how you should be nice to other people and in the main other people will be nice to you back so everyone's a winner. However, one thing that quickly becomes clear about the parables is that first-century Judea was not contemporary London.
Lets just say that loving thy neighbour is a great deal easier when your neighbour is a shepherd who lives five miles away and you see once a month than when your neighbour is a sink estate full of career criminals.
This really got me thinking. How do the Biblical parables transfer to modern life? What would they be like if Jesus had lived in Wandsworth rather than Nazareth?

The Good Samaritan

There was once a man from Samarita who was on the road to Jericho when, by the side of the road, he saw a miserable slumped figure. He was bruised and covered in contusions, his clothes ragged, his purse gone and he was covered in dust and grime. The Samitan was overcome with sympathy and kindness and stopped to ask the man what had happened to him.
"It was terrible", said the man. "I was set about by robbers, and they stole my donkey, my purse, my possessions, even the clothes on my back. I have lain here for hours and even a Levite and a Pharisee have crossed by on the other side and did not aid me."
The Samaritan was overcome with sympathy and helped the man to his feet. He took him to an inn and bought him food and paid for the finest medical attention. He bought him a new ass and new clothes, and went on his way.
Two weeks later the Samaritan was on the same road again when a familiar sight caught his eye; a miserable slumped figure. He was bruised and covered in contusions, his clothes ragged, his purse gone and he was covered in dust and grime. Propped in front of him was a piece of cardboard which read "Set about by robbers, please help".
"Mate! Mate!", said the man. "Can you help us out, like. I've been set about by robbers and a Levite and a Pharisee have passed by on the other side. Can you spare a few shekels to get me into a inn for the night?"
The Samaritan was aghast. "But, not two weeks ago, I bought you food, clothing, a new ass, everything!", he replied.
"Seriously, mate", said the man. "Can you help us out? I've got five shekels, I just need another two to get me into an inn for the night, an' maybe buy me a me pair of cider. Shoes. I mean shoes. Or can you spare a ciggie at all?"
"You don't even remember me, do you?", said the Samaritan.
"You what?"
"Get a job", said the Samaritan, and walked on.

And that's how charitable fatigue happens.

You know what?

Somehow I bet that this sequence isn't in the new Batman film.

Shame, really.