The stars are right.

HP Lovecraft wrote about it, you know. A time when the stars and constellations would align, and blasphemous terror would assert itself across the world. Horrifying, unnatural rights would be performed and unholy chants would blister the souls of all who heard them.

That's right, it's Valentines day. The she-David and I may have to hold hands and say nice things to each other.

But aside from all the lovey-dovey gooshy stuff, the more important function of Valentines Day is getting that certain someone to put out. And what better way to do that than the time-honoured manner of cooking a tasty meal for your beloved crammed with proven aphrodisiacs?* Since time immemorial people have been trying to find shortcuts to nookie and have tried pretty much everything in that process - powered rhino horn, Dried tiger willy, a concoction of honey and guano (actually one of my more successful culinary efforts)**, those blue tablets that people in Nigeria keep emailing me about.

But what do you reckon, dear reader? What is the best aphrodisiac for you?


[Poll #1818905]

^{* A cosh, perhaps?
**In reality something the ancient Egyptians swore by}