day of the Triffids - Inspired by a conversation with twicedead

[davywavy]

Oh no! It's the end of civilisation! The Triffids have risen up and overrun the earth and the necrophagic vegetables are devouring people like it's going out of fashion. You are one of the lucky ones. You are holed up in a safe location with large stocks of food and weaponry and as safe from the Triffids as can be.
One day, a survivor shows up at your stockade and through the kindness of your heart you take him in to protect him from said carniverous cucumbers. However, it quickly turns out that this survivor is a wrong 'un and he's not changing his ways, either - not only does he sneer and spit and call you names, but he also beats up and molests your missus and steals some of your valuable food supplies and clean water. What do you do?

[Poll #730506]

Comments

[twicedead.livejournal.com]

I'm gonna chuck him, but not when there are Triffids nearby, and I'm going to give him supplies and some chances.

If the Triffids are in the area, then he will most definitely be just locked in the cupboard.

On the other hand, I don't see this as a very good parallel for our modern society, where we have many more options thanbnks to a large constabulary and judiciary to deal with such reprobates.

And should Triffids attack I'm off to the island for my multiple wives!

[angusabranson.livejournal.com]

In the case above the safest thing for your own survival would be to 'pop a cap in his head'. Otherwise he could come back and haunt you at a later date and with only limited supplies and no real back-up you want to minimise any chance of something/anything coming back to cause you further problems later on.

[tooth-fairy.livejournal.com]

Tie him to a chair and throw the food at him that no one else wants

[medusa-nw.livejournal.com]

I'd chuck him out. You took him in and did him a favour, and he abused your trust. He didn't have to, but he did anyway. So he can see how he gets on with the Triffids, sounds like they could be best mates!

Without the molesting of the Mrs I might have just locked him in the broomcupboard though. ;-)

[tooth-fairy.livejournal.com]

Can you comment on this for me?

http://tooth-fairy.livejournal.com/707455.html

I'm not flattery whoring, I just respect your opinion and I'd like to know what you think.

It is screened.

[(Anonymous)]

The really saintly thing to do would be to turn the other cheek, take the abuse without complaint, and if he steals from you, give him the food as a gift (as in this (http://education.yahoo.com/homework_help/cliffsnotes/les_miserables/8.html) famous story).

I wonder how many people could actually do this, though?

There's a rather sneering anecdote by Martin Amis in "The Moronic Inferno" in which Amis reports going to watch the performance of an American evangelical preacher. "You hit me, and I'll turn the other cheek. But you hit my wife or kids, boy, and I'll put you on the floor." Amis presents this as rather contemptible, but for the life of me I still can't see why. It seems a perfectly practicable moral code to me.

H

[cleosilver.livejournal.com]

If he won't contribute with work then he must contrubute in other ways.
Fresh meat for dinner tonight : )

[tzel.livejournal.com]

I'd bind his hands behind his back and tie a rope to his ankles so that he had just enough rope to stagger along slowly. I'd place a small cut on his ankle so that he bled steadily but slowly. *Then* I'd throw him out to the Triffids.

[gwaunquest.livejournal.com]

The cupboards not a good idea. Think of the smell and the unhygenic results.You can't kill him yourself because he may change his ways at some point. If he's meant to survive then if you turn him out maybe he will. The worst scenario is if he finds a way to rule the Triffids and brings them down on you enmass, making you the subject of a Triffid Jhad.

[scarletdemon.livejournal.com]

I wouldn't have a wife...I'm not a lesbian. And how good looking is he?

[applez.livejournal.com]

Clearly you:

1. Tie him down and put him under guard

2. Meanwhile, go out and find fuel, maybe a few supplies

3. Fuel up his stolen Bentley/Rolls-Royce, stock up the boot with those supplies.

4. Release him into the wild with his fueled automobile, with very clear threats from your farmers' shotguns.

[hiromasaki.livejournal.com]

It is the year 1974.

Corporal Steve Rogers has been elected President.

A mutated virus infects the crops of the heartland, turning the vegetables into ravenous, flesh-eating zombies.

A 5-issue limited series, this summer... Marvel VeggieZombies! They're coming to eat your meat!

[patchworkkid.livejournal.com]

not only does he sneer and spit and call you names

"Tip napalm down your shirt
Your vest will be consumed by flames
And that will really hurt."