[Review] Superman Returns
Jul. 26th, 2006 09:43 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
davywavyDon't waste your money.
Oh, you want more?
The Good:
1) Lex Luther and the design aesthetic which follows him about. Kevin Spacey predictably chews the scenery as criminal mastermind Lex Luther and plainly has a whale of a time about it, whilst the retro-40's themed design which surrounds him and wherever he goes is a visual delight.
2) The score. You can't do much wrong with John Williams' original soundtrack.
3) Superman and his super-deeds. Every scene featuring Superman doing super stuff is a winner. There are, however, nothing like enough of them.
The Bad:
1) I'll get straight to the point: There is a moment, about two thirds into this film, wherein your jaw will hit the floor with a resounding thump at the imbecilic banality of something you have just witnessed. Up until then, it's been pretty plain sailing. It's been a bit up and down, not as good as your inner geek might hope, but not all bad. From this moment on, the film is irredemable - it is impossible to maintain any tension in moments of drama or danger. Take my advice and leave the cinema when Lois gets on board Lex's boat. You will have seen a pretty good film to this point and you won't want to spoil it.
Speaking of which...
2) Lois Lane. It is inconceivable that a person with her lumpen and uninteresting command of the English language could ever have won the Pullitzer prize*. Moreover, such a boring woman would not attract a horde of male followers who, let's face it, could have their pick of the ladies. Whilst pretty, she is so self-obsessed, sulky and generally boring that it's a wonder she hasn't got a Livejournal. Her emotional range runs irritating to sulky, and she milks it to the full.
3) Superman as stalker. Superman should be out doing super stuff, not hanging around in his ex-girlfriends garden using x-ray vision to look at her in her underwear. That's the sort of thing I would do if I had superpowers, which, take it from me, automatically means that Superman wouldn't.
An award which has gone to such megabrains as Douglas Hofstadter for Godel, Escher, Bach in the past.
Oh, you want more?
The Good:
1) Lex Luther and the design aesthetic which follows him about. Kevin Spacey predictably chews the scenery as criminal mastermind Lex Luther and plainly has a whale of a time about it, whilst the retro-40's themed design which surrounds him and wherever he goes is a visual delight.
2) The score. You can't do much wrong with John Williams' original soundtrack.
3) Superman and his super-deeds. Every scene featuring Superman doing super stuff is a winner. There are, however, nothing like enough of them.
The Bad:
1) I'll get straight to the point: There is a moment, about two thirds into this film, wherein your jaw will hit the floor with a resounding thump at the imbecilic banality of something you have just witnessed. Up until then, it's been pretty plain sailing. It's been a bit up and down, not as good as your inner geek might hope, but not all bad. From this moment on, the film is irredemable - it is impossible to maintain any tension in moments of drama or danger. Take my advice and leave the cinema when Lois gets on board Lex's boat. You will have seen a pretty good film to this point and you won't want to spoil it.
Speaking of which...
2) Lois Lane. It is inconceivable that a person with her lumpen and uninteresting command of the English language could ever have won the Pullitzer prize*. Moreover, such a boring woman would not attract a horde of male followers who, let's face it, could have their pick of the ladies. Whilst pretty, she is so self-obsessed, sulky and generally boring that it's a wonder she hasn't got a Livejournal. Her emotional range runs irritating to sulky, and she milks it to the full.
3) Superman as stalker. Superman should be out doing super stuff, not hanging around in his ex-girlfriends garden using x-ray vision to look at her in her underwear. That's the sort of thing I would do if I had superpowers, which, take it from me, automatically means that Superman wouldn't.
An award which has gone to such megabrains as Douglas Hofstadter for Godel, Escher, Bach in the past.
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Super bitch slaps you
Date: 2006-07-26 08:54 am (UTC)Re: Super bitch slaps you
Date: 2006-07-26 08:56 am (UTC)Right.
Re: Super bitch slaps you
Date: 2006-07-26 08:57 am (UTC)If he were stalking he would have known the best time would have been at 9.17 when she takes her bath...
Re: Super bitch slaps you
Date: 2006-07-26 08:58 am (UTC)Re: Super bitch slaps you
Date: 2006-07-26 08:59 am (UTC)Re: Super bitch slaps you
Date: 2006-07-26 09:00 am (UTC)Re: Super bitch slaps you
Date: 2006-07-26 09:03 am (UTC)