Saviour of the Universe

[davywavy]

Watching the 1980 Flash Gordon the other night, I realised that I'd forgotten what a good film it is. It presses all the buttons for a great cult movie - the plot is utterly awful but the dialogue is great, the cast is perfect, and the design aesthetic is fantastic.
One of the highlights of the film is Brian Blessed's Prince Vultan. Blessed brings his enourmous acting talent to the role, ranging from booming, mirthful anger, to booming, mirthful regret and sadness to booming, mirthful humour. As an acting presnce, he is truly without equal. indeed, I've never seen anything with him in which he hasn't improved by his presence. Even The Phantom Menace was made slightly less awful by him. In fact, I'd go so far as to say that there is no film at all which wouldn't have been improved by casting Brian Blessed in the lead role.


Gone with the wind
"Rhett... if you go, where shall I go, what shall I do?"
"FRANKLY MY DEAR! I DON'T GIVE A DAMN! HAHAHA!"

Forrest Gump
MAMA ALWAYS SAID LIFE IS LIKE A BOX OF CHOCOLATES. YOU NEVER KNOW WHAT YOU'RE GOING TO GET! WOO! HAHAHAHAHAHA!

Citizen Kane
"ROSEBUD!!!HAHAHAHA!"

To have an have not
"YOU KNOW HOW TO WHISTLE DON'T YOU! JUST PUT YOUR LIPS TOGETHER AND BLOW! HAHAHA!"

Blade Runner.
"I'VE SEEN THINGS YOU PEOPLE WOULDN'T BELIEVE! HAHA! ATTACK SHIPS ON FIRE OFF THE SHOULDER OF ORION! I WATCHED T-BEAMS GLITTER IN THE DARK OF THE TANNHAUSER GATE! ALL THOSE MOMENTS WILL BE LOST LIKE TEARS IN THE RAIN! HAHA! TIME TO DIVE! OOPS! HAHA!"

Comments

[twicedead.livejournal.com]

Batty's alive!

[davywavy.livejournal.com]

THANKS! FOR GIVING A DUMB OLD BLADE RUNNER A SECOND CHANCE! HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

[(Anonymous)]

Bond: Do you expect me to talk?
NO, MR BOND! I EXPECT YOU TO DIE! HAHAHAHAHA!

H

[davywavy.livejournal.com]

It would dramatically imprive any Bond film.

[davywavy.livejournal.com]

One day soon, the CGI technology will become available to paste Brian into Titanic intead of Leo. And on that day I shall be first in the queue at the cinema.

[silver-blue.livejournal.com]

I must get a copy of Flash Gordon actually.

Also my favourite movie quote; "Flash, I love you, but we only have 14 hours to save Earth."

Though if you were Flash, wouldn't you have gone for Princess Aurora instead?

[karohemd.livejournal.com]

Hell yeah, there are few things hotter than Ornella Muti in skin-tight red lycra.

[davywavy.livejournal.com]

That was one thing I was wondering whilst watching - I mean, apart from the dose of space-clap there's no way that Dale would ever have found out.

[applez.livejournal.com]

You have a rare talent for ruining cherished movies of my memories. ;-)

Whatever do you mean?

[davywavy.livejournal.com]

"Open the pod bay doors, Hal"
"I'M SORRY I CAN'T DO THAT DAVE! HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!"

Brian Blessed vs. William Shatner?

[applez.livejournal.com]

...at the Earth's Core. The emoting would be combustible! At least Blessed is genuinely hard, and would probably kick Shatner's derrier.

Re: Brian Blessed vs. William Shatner?

[davywavy.livejournal.com]

I did consider Wrath of Kahn with Blessed, but how would you be able to tell?

KHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAN!

Re: Brian Blessed vs. William Shatner?

[applez.livejournal.com]

You Klingon bastard...you killed my son! You Klingon bastard, you killed my son! ... my son ...

HAHAHAHAHAAHAHA!

Re: Brian Blessed vs. William Shatner?

[davywavy.livejournal.com]

See? He'd improve any film!

[(Anonymous)]

That BB comes from Wath has nothing whatsoever to do with your views of course

D

[davywavy.livejournal.com]

Goldthorpe, actually, but hear enough. Additionally, Diana Rigg comes from Doncaster, Patrick Stewart from Dewsbury and Donald Pleasance from Conisborough. It's a hotbed of talent round there.

[thegreenman.livejournal.com]

I remember seeing a clip of him on some Quiz show awarding the prize:

"Palm Pilot? SOUNDS LIKE A WANKING MACHINE TO ME!!!!!"

[rssefuirosu.livejournal.com]

YOUR LIFE IS THE SUM OF A REMAINDER OF AN UNBALANCE EQUATION INHERENT TO THE PROGRAMMING OF THE MATRIX, HAHAHAHAHAHA. YOU ARE THE EVENTUALITY OF AN ANOMALY, WHICH DESPITE MY SINCEREST EFFORTS I HAVE BEEN UNABLE TO ELIMINATE FROM WHAT IS OTHERWISE A HARMONY OF MATHEMATICAL PRECISION, HAHAHAHAHA. WHILE IT REMAINS A BURDEN ASSIDUOUSLY AVOIDED, IT IS NOT UNEXPECTED, HAHAHAHAHA, AND THUS NOT BEYOND A MEASURE OF CONTROL. WHICH HAS LED YOU, INEXORABLY, HERE, HAHAHAHAHAHAHA.

[davywavy.livejournal.com]

You see? Matrix revolutions would have been immeasurably improved.

That said, I still prefer this ending.