I can't see how rich people ever get bored.

[davywavy]

In my question of a week or so ago, I asked people what the lowest denomination coin they'd be willing to reach into a public lavatory bowl would be. I was interested by the results, not least because they indicated that I could get a small crowd of my friends plunging their hands into suspect water for less than a tenner - money well spent in anybody's book.
Of this group, token_limey and baloobas indicated that they'd take the plunge (as it were) for a single Zimbabwean dollar.
In case you didn't know, thanks to hyperinflation the Zimbabwean dollar is the lowest value currency ever to exist; in the international currency markets, it is currently trading lower than the cowrie shell, the short sick and even the pebble with a single dollar being worth less than 0.0000000001 pence. It's the only currency I've ever seen with a best before date.
Still, as I've always wanted to be a millionnaire, I've made an acquisition:

.*

So, token_limey and baloobas, get your sleeves rolled up. If you're willing to go bowl diving for a single dollar, I reckon you're going to be busy for a while.

^{*At close of trading yesterday, five hundred million Zimbabwean dollars was worth approximately 0.9 pence. My wallet feels all the heavier for it.}

Comments

[blue-cat.livejournal.com]

I do not often comment but this time you stun me :)

This is freaking hysterical!

[davywavy.livejournal.com]

If I'd thought about it, I would ahve bought one of these:

http://www.guardian.co.uk/business/feedarticle/7663377

I want one.

[davywavy.livejournal.com]

Theoretically, yes, but buying them off ebay like I did is probably easier, if not cheaper.
Most currency exchange places will want a minimum transaction of £100, which would entail buying more than Z$700 billion.

[davywavy.livejournal.com]

even half way across the country contact with you apparently folds the corners of my soul

And I didn't have to even lay a finger on you. I must be improving.

[riksowden.livejournal.com]

Ebay you say?

I might well have to follow your example...i TOO want to be a millionaire!

[davywavy.livejournal.com]

Who wouldn't? Imagine the hilarity of betting! "I say, Bill Gates, I bet you Five Hundred Million dollars that I can sink a yard of ale" Imagine the cheer if you win, and his comical chagrin if he wins!

It's a Beano strip just waiting to happen.

[riksowden.livejournal.com]

It surely is!

David saves the world

[(Anonymous)]

"Oh no, Dr Evil is threatening to unleash his doomsday fembots upon the world unless we pay him ... one hundred million dollars."

"Hang on, that gives me an idea." &c


H

Re: David saves the world

[davywavy.livejournal.com]

That may be the explanation; Blofeld is threatening Zimbabwe and Mugabe is saving up to buy him off?

Re: David saves the world

[(Anonymous)]

Sorry ... all things considered, what fate, exactly, could Blofeld be threatening Zimbabwe with?

Re: David saves the world

[davywavy.livejournal.com]

Free and fair elections?

[medusa-nw.livejournal.com]

How much did you pay for it on e-bay?

[davywavy.livejournal.com]

About a fiver, including mailing.

[medusa-nw.livejournal.com]

Now there's a simple way for Zimbabwians (sp?) to make some stable money...

[davywavy.livejournal.com]

I was surprised more aren't doing it.

[medusa-nw.livejournal.com]

Perhaps the postage costs more then their car is worth?

[morgan303.livejournal.com]

Or Paypal just can't process numbers over a trillion for the Zimbabwe interface.

[(Anonymous)]

You can tell you're in trouble when your currency carries a "sell by" date.

H

[davywavy.livejournal.com]

It's misleadaing; the date should be 1998.

[davywavy.livejournal.com]

On the basis of previous association, I naturally assumed you had.

[davywavy.livejournal.com]

Do you mean to say you'd *sniff* *snivel* lie to me?

Right, that's it. I'm off to top myself.

[davywavy.livejournal.com]

Ooh, you're smooth.

Re: God I'm cheap :)

[davywavy.livejournal.com]

I'll lend you a snorkel.

[rhythmaning.livejournal.com]

The BBC had an article about the new 100 billion Zimbawean dollar note (http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/world/africa/7516874.stm) - which buys two loaves of bread (today - it might only be one, tomorrow).

So you could have been a billionaire!

[morgan303.livejournal.com]

Hello,
I came across your journal via a friend's friends-list, and really enjoy your writing (it was the Chap Olympics post that finally motivated me to drop you a line here, that was fabulous), so I hope you don't mind me adding you. No obligation to reciprocate, of course; at the moment my journal is mostly filled with stuff about animals, particularly horses, since that's where life's leading me at the moment. It used to be all dandification and velvet and cultural theory, but then I got a job as a riding instructor/farmhand and spend my days more covered in manure than pinstripes. If this doesn't thrill you I won't be in the least offended. But I thought I should mention that I've added you, since I like it when people do the same thing for me.

[davywavy.livejournal.com]

After a charming intro like that, it would be positively rude of me not to friend you.

[morgan303.livejournal.com]

Ooh thanks!:)
I'll have to lift my game now, and not just rely on cute pictures of mice to keep my posting quota up.

500 million dollars?

[applez.livejournal.com]

That should make paying off the SPECTRE nuclear blackmailers dead easy! :-)

[smhoffmann.livejournal.com]

This is unrelated and a little strange, but I'm collecting found phrases from various places and illustrating them. I hope you don't mind that I've stolen one of yours: "There was only one place in London on Saturday that a man in plus-fours and spats could possibly be going."

The thing is, I began drawing and realized I'm not sure how one wears plus-fours and spats. Were they knee-high spats?

[davywavy.livejournal.com]

More this sort of thing:

[davywavy.livejournal.com]

Although they were more faux-spats in that they were a single two-tone shoe.

[(Anonymous)]

You Sir, are an utter fraud, two tone shoes indeed. You would be left alone in the library with a decent armagnac and a Webley....if we didn't know you would attempt to shoot your way out.

D

(are you sure you were not responsible for the Zimbabwean Contitutional arrangements we set up back in '80?)