None of this 'client-centred counselling' round here, thank you very much.

[davywavy]

A while ago, I found myself in a seedy B&B performing acts which would make a Liberal Democrat MP blush*. When not otherwise engaged, I looked over the meagre selection of books on the shelf where to my delight I happened across the December 1939 edition of PG Wodehouses' Leave it to Jeeves and, after a quick chat with the proprietor, I was its owner.
It's slightly odd checking the date on a book and finding it to be that old, and what's more it seems to be an edition printed with the idea of soldiers taking something to read off to war with them as on the back it has this advert (click to enbiggen):



I love this advert. Got Post-traumatic Stress Disorder and Stress-induced psychosis? Have a fag! No time for any of that sissified counselling when there's Hitler to sort out! That's a full-sized mans job to do, and no mistake.

If I ever bother to use my qualifications in the manner for which they were intended, I'll be this sort of psychologist. Depression? Have a fag! Future Shock syndrome? Twenty Marlboro! Anxiety Attacks? A pack of Capstan extra-strength. That's proper psychiatric care, that is.



^{*Note for American readers: Liberal Democrat MPs are sort of a British equivalent of your televangelists. They pop up on television, all brilliantined hair and gleaming white teeth, promising a glorious future world at some unspecified date in return for your money right now. When the future finally arrives you discover that not only is it not as wonderful as they said, but they've gone off and spent all your money doing something unspeakable with a rentboy in a hotel room.}

Comments

[http://users.livejournal.com/_grimtales_/]

Wait... doesn't that more appropriately describe... ALL the political parties? Though Gord is neither brillatined or gleaming.

[(Anonymous)]

Nice to see you back Mr. Grim.

If you have time, you will recall you promised to tell me what sort of service mobile telecoms companies should provide.

[http://users.livejournal.com/_grimtales_/]

I forget what it was in reference to precisely. I'll have a look back through the old posts and see if I can find the context.

[http://users.livejournal.com/_grimtales_/]

Gah, point me in the right direction.

[(Anonymous)]

I think you can probably find the thread just as easily as I, and as it's your job to keep your word, I think you can anticipate my answer to that one.

[http://users.livejournal.com/_grimtales_/]

Well I've had a dig around and couldn't find the thread. That's a reasonable attempt to keep it and, frankly, I can't be arsed with dealing with shirty and uncooperative anons.

IIRC we were talking about nationalised industries and how essential services tend to work better as institutions rather than as myriad private hyenas tearing at your bank accounts as though they were the carcass of a rotting wilderbeest.

In which case why would the services necessarily be any different? The point would be that they'd be cheaper and universal with a different emphasis.

That's IF I'm remembering the context of the conversation right and without finding the old conversation and double checking that's all an anon's getting.

[(Anonymous)]

That's okay, If your word means nothing to you, I think you can guess what it means to me. I shan't trouble you for more of your 'opinions'.

[davywavy.livejournal.com]

FFS the pair of you. You'll be at this all day. Here: http://davywavy.livejournal.com/383581.html?thread=5847645#t5847645

Go and play there.

God, and I keep this blog for my entertainment.

[davywavy.livejournal.com]

Deleted for breach of my 'no swearing' policy.

[(Anonymous)]

Was there a chain/monkey moment? I missed it.

[sherbetsaucers.livejournal.com]

That's a stunning piece of advertising! Makes me proud to be British.

I'm just curious, is it a full sived job for men to do, or a job for full sized men to do? And what is a full sized man or indeed a full sized job?

[davywavy.livejournal.com]

I'm a full-sized man, sonny. Just ask the ladies.

Oh, yeah.

[sherbetsaucers.livejournal.com]

I tried that, but couldn't make out whatthey said over all the giggling.

[davywavy.livejournal.com]

Those weren't giggles, they were gasps of awe.

[http://users.livejournal.com/_grimtales_/]

Test man-sized tissues?

[sherbetsaucers.livejournal.com]

Was that an answer to the question, or a sugestion as to what I do with my day?

[http://users.livejournal.com/_grimtales_/]

Both?
See if you can make a man sized parachute out of tissues?

[zenicurean.livejournal.com]

I'd throw free rentboys at Nick Clegg's direction if that magically empowered him to mysteriously replace Dr Brown, though.

[danfossydan.livejournal.com]

On the principle that anything is better than Brown. Shockingly I think anything being better than Brown, doesn't actually include Clegg :(

[(Anonymous)]

If one could have Cable, sans Clegg, I'd buy that for a dollar.

[(Anonymous)]

You must admit, when you've got Jerry bearing down on you with a machine gun shouting "Die, Englander Schweinhund" you're not going to be worrying about the long term deleterious effects of second hand smoke

H

[karohemd.livejournal.com]

That ad is ace. Reminds of an US one from the mid-50s along the lines of "9 out 10 doctors recommend Lucky Strike cigarettes". I can't find it now.

[davywavy.livejournal.com]

There's planty of examples here: http://www.nytimes.com/2008/10/07/business/media/07adco.html

Have you seen Thank you for smoking? I recommend it highly - probably my favourite film of 2006.

[karohemd.livejournal.com]

The specific one I was referring to isn't there but yes, there were plenty of those. :o)
I haven't but want to, thanks for the reminder. I'll add it to my rental list.

[davywavy.livejournal.com]

Aaron Ekhart's character in it is my hero.

[davywavy.livejournal.com]

As a qualified psychologist, I prescribe you some rough shag.
For purely medicinal reasons, obviously.

[(Anonymous)]

Can you sit down again yet?

[applez.livejournal.com]

Yeah, though that kind of retro-psychiatry would also have to involve liver-destroying quantities of booze and some classic gender violence.

[davywavy.livejournal.com]

It's the job I was made for.