Not suitable for children. Or my mum.

[davywavy]

One of the latest literary (I use the term advisedly) fads is updating classic novels to include all the frisky sex scenes which the original authors so absent-mindedly left out. Sense and Sensibility, Jane Eyre, Wuthering Heights, Sherlock Holmes and more have all had new editions released with additional bits of porn inserted (as it were) into the text, just like I'm sure Conan Doyle and the Brontes really intended had they not been stuck in those boring olden days.

What strikes me about this most of all is that someone is making money out of it, and when there's a fast buck to be made I'm there. So, I've been thinking about which classics to which I could add some hastily-written smut.

Fifty Shades of Grayskull: The Sorceress helps Prince Adam discover incredible powers when he holds aloft his magic sword, Man-at-Arms uses his gadgets on Evil-lynn in a manner which is illegal in 39 American states, and Orko discovers that Skeletor really does have a bone in those tights.

Fifty shades of Greystoke: The infant Tarzan is rescued by a family of friendly bonobo monkeys and learns his social behaviour from them, which comes in handy when he rescues Jane some years later. An extended sequence featuring Tarzan, Jane and Cheetah the chimpanzee has been described as "Superbly written and exciting" by the residents of Broadmoor prison.

Fifty Shades of Grayfriars: When Greyfriars boarding school goes co-educational, "Winker" Watson gains a new hobby (and a new nickname).

Comments

[twicedead.livejournal.com]

Fifty shades of Greyfriars Bobby: A dog, a graveyard and some Furry Necrophilia.

Fifty Shades of Gravy: The latest edition of the Naked Chef.

Fifty shades of Grand Theft Auto: Um, basically the same game. But with more hookers and fewer guns.

[davywavy.livejournal.com]

I considered fifty shades of Greyfriars Bobby, but didn't want two Greyfriars in the same post.

But yes, mine was largely the same as yours.

[(Anonymous)]

Fifty shades of ghey. I don't know what it's about, but you feature centrally throughout.

[(Anonymous)]

Fifty shades of Cray.

Some geeks get excited about their supercomputer.

[(Anonymous)]

50 shades of Kray: Gangsta pr)n

[zenicurean.livejournal.com]

Fifty Shades of Gray's Anatomy of the Human Body, Descriptive and Surgical: Risque images of hot pulmonary and arterial valves getting rhythmical! Everything exposed!

Fifty Shades of Grey Aliens: A wonderful re-telling of H.G. Wells' The First Men in the Moon, where Mr Bedford and Dr Cavor travel to the Moon and spend all their time expositing about the Selenites' advanced mechanical and technical inventions. If you know what I mean.

Fifty Shades of the Picture of Dorian Gray: The world's most famous story which is actually fanfic about itself finally expands to its natural, majestic scope.

[davywavy.livejournal.com]

I do like Fifty Shades of Grays Anatomy. I rather wish I'd thought of it.

[gnommi.livejournal.com]

a friend came up with a Game of Thrones/E.L.James crossover: "Fifty Maids of Frey".

[zenicurean.livejournal.com]

Nooo! You're giving George R.R. Martin ideas!

[moomin-puffin.livejournal.com]

I like all of the fifty shades ideas here more than the idea of the fifty shades of grey book. I read the blurb on the back cover in ASDA and that was enough, back to proper porn I say ;)