Scots National Party unveil "letter to Father Christmas"

[davywavy]

In an unexpected move yesterday, SNP leader Alex Salmond unveiled a letter to Father Christmas written by an eight year old rather than the much hyped and expected blueprint for an independent Scotland. However Salmond insisted that the letter, written by Calum Gilhoolie of Dundee and put up the chimney on the 23rd of November, was "aspirational, achievable and contained fully-costed and workable proposals which people will see the sense of".

In the note, Calum tells Santa that he is unhappy sharing a house with his brother and asks that Father Christmas make him move out, with the caveat that Calum be allowed to 'keep playing with his toys whenever i like but he won't be allowed to play with mine". He then goes on to say that he'd like lots more pocket money, which Santa could take off his brother after he has gone away.
Adding to the list of requests, Calum then asks Santa for 'lots of soldiers but only nice ones who dont have any guns to shoot anybody", "a special magic car which goes really fast and never runs out of petrol" "a holiday in europe whenever i like" and "being allowed to stay up to watch Ripper Street".

The letter, written in yellow crayon, then goes off at a tangent to tell Santa all about Calums friends. In early drafts the 8-year-old says his "two bestest friends are Irish and Icelandic because they are rich", but this section appears to have been scribbled out with a biro and a hasty addendum notes that his best friend is actually German. However, polling in Germany indicates that nobody there has heard of him.

When asked to comment on the prospects of Father Christmas bringing little Calum the presents he wants, Calum's father, Dougal, said: "The little beggar can have a pair of socks and a bike and like it".

Comments

[robinbloke.livejournal.com]

This sort of stuff is why you should write for a political column ;)

We can't realistically expect Santa to grant his wishes, he hasn't been very good.

[davywavy.livejournal.com]

I've got a couple of Scots Nats on my flist, and they've been damned quiet over the last day or two.

Possibly there's a reason for that.

[(Anonymous)]

Reason has nothing to do with it. I got's to aks why you associate with Scots Nazis?

[davywavy.livejournal.com]

Did not Our Lord associate with thieves, tax gatherers and prostitutes?

[(Anonymous)]

Yeah, but dude, Satan hadn't invented socialism back then, and I'm pretty certain he'd've drawn the line.

[zenicurean.livejournal.com]

I've got a couple of Scots Nats on my flist

Likewise. (I also have a very colourful friends list, politics-wise.) Their view of the situation seems to be that Salmond is being ragged on a bit too much for what is, after all, at its core a complicated wish list, but they generally concede that John Swinney (http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/politics/10466211/SNP-claims-yes-vote-forces-English-to-share-the-pound.html) deserved getting pointed and laughed at.

[davywavy.livejournal.com]

Given that a no vote is a formality, I do think they're making a lot of a song and dance about a non-event.

[zenicurean.livejournal.com]

Now, far be it from me to comment on the delicate domestic issues of distant countries, but yeah, it does seem like the Yes side is seriously out of steam. Panelbase's latest poll gives 38% for Yes, 47% for No, and 15% undecided... and these are without doubt the most optimistic figures that the Yes camp can muster right now.

I am, as always, following events with interest in the hopes that a pie fight will break out between Westminster and Holyrood.

[davywavy.livejournal.com]

Westminster recognise that a fight would only weaken them, so they're playing it very quiet and letting yesterday's men like Darling do their fighting for them, whilst leaving the city and the EU to mock Scotland's economic and political hopes.

If Westminster said a lot of the stuff the bond markets and the EU have said recently it would have strengthen the Nat position, but as it's come from third parties who the Scots will need to suck up to it's carrying a lot more weight.

[rhythmaning.livejournal.com]

Very good!